mind still exploding. im always in between these hate the world moods that strike me, in the middle of a little bit of grumptasticness or deliriously happy and smiley cause life is shining so brite on my little patch of life. but i can be a seriously grumpy fuck for no real reason. im moody, i shift, i degenerate into a 12 year old boy who hates everything or maybe loves everything irrationally. but is still an indecisive, non-communicative boy.
it just means that im scared. that i dont know what im doing and that im unsure about the future. that all this uncertainty and all this newness make me really fucking uncomfortable. i smile, i walk, and i try to let it all wash down around me while not being too affected. hard.